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“Unicorn” is slang for a single, generally bi-sexual female who participates in swinger lifestyle. Women like this are referred to as unicorns because they are very rare and hard to find.

Being a coveted unicorn is a blessing and a curse. I love having the freedom and confidence to enjoy sex with whomever I choose. I love that I have so many people to choose from since unicorns are not too common. Experienced unicorns often find themselves frustrated because couples who seek them out don’t always know how to approach them. Have you wondered how to approach a unicorn? Here’s a list of things a unicorn wants you to keep in mind when you invite them to meet with you.

I am a person

I’m not a prop or an object or a sex toy. I am not a porn star or a fictitious sex driven fantasy woman. I’m aware that you’re contacting me for a specific reason, but that’s not the only reason I exist. If you’re contacting me online, choose your words mindfully. An introductory email about “cumming all over that sexy body” or “laying the pipe down” does not make me want to drop everything to meet you. Try an intelligent respectful introduction with some reference to what you read in my profile instead. If you meet me in person at a club or party, treat me the way you’d treat anyone you’re meeting in public for the first time.

I have my own fantasies too

If you’re part of a couple and you’re contacting me, you probably have an idea of what you’d like to experience when you add another woman. Keep in mind that even though the two of you know what you want, the only way I’m going to be willing to participate is if I can get what I want too. Ask me about my fantasies. Pay attention when I tell you what I am looking for and what I enjoy. Too often, couples want to center the experience around the two of them entirely. If your fantasy makes me the source of your pleasure without allowing me to be pleasured as well, I’m not interested.

I’m not your experiment

If you’re new to the lifestyle and we have good chemistry, your lack of experience won’t matter at all. However, you might be a couple with far too many rules. You might be a couple that wants things go exactly according to your plan because you (understandably) want to be as comfortable as possible. If you need to move slowly, I respect that. If one of you isn’t sure they’re ready, I totally respect that BUT I’m not going to play with you. I don’t want to go home sexually frustrated. I don’t want to be a source of tension if things go “too far” and I don’t want to waste my precious time or yours. If you want to lightly test the waters, find someone who is also new to this. Try a party or club and see if you can meet someone who is up for some flirting and light play.

I’m not your teacher

Do you want me to guide you through your first threesome? Are you looking for someone to “help” a wife or girlfriend try her first bisexual experience? I have a few important questions: What’s in it for me? Why would I want to turn my playtime into a tutoring session? What if one of you is not a good “student”? I’d rather not set myself up for disappointment.

I have a life of my own

If we do meet and have a great time, please remember that I have a life outside of being your play partner. I am so much more than a unicorn. My career, my family, my friends, and my own goals and needs are important to me. Respect my priorities. If you’re the type who takes it personally if I don’t respond to your messages and photos immediately, we aren’t compatible.

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