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Your first MFM threesome can be incredible – or a total nightmare. We get it. You have this fantasy in your mind of how it will go… or maybe you’re just terrified to put yourself out there (even if you’re part of a couple). Whatever you’re feeling, it’s totally normal! Here are some tips from people who’ve lived it and learned.

Get out of your head!

Turn off the porn (which will lead to false expectations). Read up on real-life first times. Most people are really nervous going into their first MFM threesome and that is totally okay! Also, really talk to your partner in practical terms about who you want to share this experience with — it should be good for both of you. [via]

Communication will be the most important thing you do (seriously).

Consent is sexy, and it keeps you all on the same page. Let her lead, unless they tell you to lead. In which case, communicate a lot and be willing to laugh a lot. Laughter and ease are so important when you’re getting together for the first time. Otherwise, don’t drink too much (also can hurt performance), maybe bring some portable music for the room in case they don’t have any (it really helps set the mood), and bring something to drink in the room (a bunch of water bottles, plus something you or they might like if you do alcohol). Don’t just walk in the room and start taking your clothes off. The whole process should be fun! [via]

Use protection.

Hygiene and health is first priority. Use condoms for everything if you can, not all STDs are obviously visible with men as with women. Even if the guy says he is clean and he didn’t do any tests, he cannot know for sure. [via]

Aftercare needs to happen.

Immediately, especially after your MFM threesome, you need to reconnect yourselves and just be together, reminding yourself that your primary relationship is great. Then you need to spend time talking about the experience – what you liked, what you didn’t, what you’d do again. Spend quality time on this, as often what you think you’ll enjoy you won’t and what you weren’t sure about you’ll have found was amazing. Going from fantasy to reality is funny like that… [via]

Don’t stress.

We were SO nervous when we first met the guy, but we ended up having a great time chatting and it all played out well in the bedroom. Again, communicate with them and be yourself, and you’ll have a blast! (pun intended) [via]

Try not to do it with friends.

IMHO, people can either handle the sex or not, everything else is drama. It’s not too different from FWB experiences. Be an adult, it’s just sex, and that’s all. Some people can do that, some (or a lot, as it seems to be) cannot. I tend to belive in “don’t make it awkward,” and guess what — there’s little to no awkwardness. [via]

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